Washing instructions :)

Alternative title: how to get yourself held hostage in a Medan Laundromat


1. Take yours and your sister’s clothes to the "5 a sec" Laundromat in Medan.
2. Scoff at the ridiculously high price (300,000Rp - approximately A$40) for washing 20 items of clothing, but put them in anyway because you can’t be bothered washing them, and you want to get out of Medan.
3. Return early from Berastagi in order to collect your clothes before the closing time of 6pm.
4. DO NOT RINSE IN HOT WATER
5. Take your ticket in for collection of your clothes, and then wait around for 45 minutes for the staff to process all other customers’ orders before yours.
6. While waiting additional time for them to dig up one last item, have a quick look through your clothes to see how well they were washed.
7. Become rapidly shocked because a couple of items are just as dirty as when you put submitted them for washing.
8. Agree with your sister to refuse to pay for a service not rendered.
9. When you finally get served, inform the staff of this and show them the evidence (ie filthy clothes).
10. When the staff call over their manager because they clearly have never had anyone refuse to pay before, begin a discussion (in Bahasa Indonesian) with him about not paying and why.
11. Begin to get a bit frustrated when he says that you must pay the full amount even if the clothes are not properly clean
12. Dismiss the the manager as he points to the ‘disclaimer’ board on the wall that states that the company will not take responsibility for clothes that are not properly cleaned, if there is a risk that harsher washing techniques will destroy them.
13. Stop them from trying to clean your clothes further in store, and watch in surprise when they begin to shut up shop and lock the front shutters, effectively locking you in the shop.
14. Disagree with their suggestion to wash them again and return them to you the next day – because you have to get an early morning flight to Singapore.
15. DRY CLEAN ONLY
16. Suggest to only pay for clean clothes. Go through every item and discover that only ten of the twenty items are clean. Offer to pay 50% of the cost.
17. When the manager refuses and continually insists that you must pay the full amount before letting you leave the store, decide to discontinue the now heated discussion and employ the ‘wait him out’ tactics of playing the card game ShitHead on the floor of the shop. Enjoy the interest shown by the staff and their bemusement at the situation as you play.
18. Observe the discussion turn into a full blown argument (did I mention how difficult it is to argue/get mad effectively in another language?!).
19. Decide that the manager is a f*@#ing wanker.
20. Inform them that they cannot hold you hostage in their premises, and ask to use their phone to call the police. When they refuse to give you the number, call directory assistance and your hotel to find out.
21. Get more frustrated because none of the numbers you have are working and the line is constantly busy.
22. Begin to explore other avenues of escape, including upstairs and the rear exit. Keep arguing with the manager in the meantime.
23. Convince the staff to call the police using their phone when you can’t get through.
24. Manoeuver yourself to the rear alleyway of the shop and try to push past the manager and security guard, unsuccessfully avoiding being manhandled.
25. Continue to try this tactic while attempting to keep hold of the bag of clothes, and eventually give up in exasperation and anger at being blocked and manhandled by the security guard and manager.
26. However, maintain your stance and eventually win a moral victory when the manager finally succumbs and agrees to let you pay half.
27. Walk out of the store in triumph, and refuse to give your phone number to the cheeky (but cute) staff member who first asked for it on behalf of his (not-so-cute) colleague and then for himself (out of pity for the first guy, even though you are tempted).
28. Run into traffic police 20m up the road and try to report it to them, but then decide to ‘stuff it’ when they tell you to go to the metro police station instead.
29. Laugh about it for a number of days to come.
30. WASH WITH LIKE COLOURS ONLY.